Planned Neglect

I was reading a John MacArthur article a few weeks ago and the phrase “planned neglect” came up.  It interested me and it got me thinking.  Obviously there are things you can neglect in your life, and things you must not and cannot or the social services department would be on your doorstep!  For instance you don’t neglect to feed your children or make sure they have clean clothes to wear and you don’t really want to neglect your personal hygiene!

 

However there are some things we can make a conscious effort to neglect in our lives – negative things which sap our joy and take our eyes off what is truly important.  Recently I took a conscious decision to neglect Facebook.  I was getting upset, offended and angered by what I was seeing on a daily basis.   From Christians.  Or people who would profess to be Christians at least.  I could choose to remain, having my senses assaulted (and sometimes deliberately going looking for things to shock me because I knew I’d find them) or I could choose to leave and take a breather, allowing my mind to recover and fix itself on the things Philippians 4v8 tells me to.  It seems to me that this verse is relevant in so many areas of my life. 

 

So I left.  For now, anyway.  I am neglecting it.  Occasionally I get itchy fingers to seek it out and see what’s going on, but for the most part, I’m content to be without it.  Instead I am reading my bible, or Christian literature, and I’m not picking up my phone a thousand times a day to see what nonsense is in my newsfeed and shake my head over it.  That has to be a good thing.  And the best part is you can still have friendships without Facebook.  I don’t need to know the nitty gritty of someone’s life.  I don’t need it played out before my very eyes.  I need to have solid, true, godly interaction that is good for me.  And hope that I can be that influence for someone else in return. 

 

There are other things in our lives that we need to neglect, ignore and not give any air-time to.  The desire in our human nature to gossip, run other people down, indulge in self-pity, give in to anger, show our impatience. I don’t want to give these things a foot hold, because they will pull me into sinking sand and drown me if I let them. 

 

Hebrews 12v2 is a better way to live.  A better focus to have.  I need to fix my eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of my faith.  When I am looking at Him, without wavering, all of these other things will fade and become dim.  I will become more like Him as a result, which in turn will help me in putting to death more of my sinful nature. 

 

“Turn your eyes up on Jesus

Look full in His wonderful face

And the things of earth

Will grow strangely dim

In the light of His glory and grace”

 

This world has so many glittering lights to entice us into sin.  When we neglect the things this world has to offer us and look to Christ, we find all we need in Him.

Promises, Promises

When I was younger, I used to have a promise box.  

 

 

 

I'm sure you know the thing I mean.  It contains individual pieces of paper, or card, with a bible verse (promise) printed on it.  The first one I had, was made up of rolled up pieces of yellow paper, which were placed vertically in the box like little soldiers standing to attention, so tightly packed against one another that you had to use special tweezers to remove your randomly selected verse.  When you got it out of the box, you unrolled it like a tiny scroll to read that day's "promise".  I used that box for all sorts of things.  I used it like one of those magic balls that you shake after asking it a question, and it reveals an answer.  ("Should I make up with my sister after our row?"  Answer ..."Follow your heart".)  The promise box was very similar to me.  If I had a dilemma, I'd consult the box.  The truth is, I'd keep picking out mini cigar-shaped pieces of paper, until I found one that a) I liked and b) was relevant.  This might take half a dozen attempts, so I'd just keep putting the disappointing ones back in their place and trying again.    I'd close my eyes, wave the tweezers above the box, then drive them into what I'd hoped would be a "better" one.  Or I'd tell myself "if I get that verse in Revelation, then I should ask "Johnny" out", knowing full well where that particular piece of paper was located in the box and how easy it would be to find, making me convince myself that it was God's will that I did this, that or the next thing.  One time our family were going through a particularly hard time at church and I plucked out Exodus 14v15, telling me "Why are you crying out to me? Tell the Israelites to move on".  I boldly announced to my parents that God gave me this verse and that I felt we should leave that church.  They were pretty gracious to me, considering my arrogance and knee-jerk reactions.  It didn't cross my mind that God was speaking directly to Moses about the Israelites, and not speaking into my personal situation. 

That's the trouble with these little boxes.  They can encourage us to take every verse out of context and live them out like a daily horoscope.  There is no denying that every Word of scripture is God-breathed (2nd Timothy 3v16) and can teach, rebuke, correct and train us.  But a single verse taken out of context is not what we should be pinning our hopes on, just because we like the sound of it and it kind of fits into our situation.  We should be more concerned with the character of God than handpicking our "verse of the day".  God's promises are true, and every promise He makes, He keeps.  Some of those promises were made to certain people in history, for certain situations, and a certain outcome.  The danger arises when we try to make God say what we want Him to. What we are supposed to do, is seek first the Kingdom of God, and accept that the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away, as He sees fit.  We cannot twist scripture to suit us.  Rather, we should go to scripture and let it permeate our hearts and minds and ask for wisdom, which will be granted to us.  Not pluck out 10 verses from a box until we get the one we want.  If we are becoming transformed by the renewing of our mind, we will be able to test and approve what God's will is, in any situation, by the guidance of the Holy Spirit, our Comforter.

Prodigals

For those parents who struggle with their prodigals. 

I watch from a distance, and this is the start -

My prodigal child, you are breaking my heart.

You're finding your own way; what will it take

To see what you're doing and slam on the brakes?

Decisions you're making, the friends that you choose,

It's all going to end with you battered and bruised.

And yet I can't help you, I have to let go,

And where life will take you, God only knows.

I see the destruction that's coming your way

And all I can do is just fall down and pray

That God would deliver you, ransom your soul,

Grant you salvation and then make you whole.

Without Him, it's hopeless, and yet you don't see

Sin has you captive, you'll never be free,

You're locked in its grasp, you succumbed to its charms

But all it will do is bring heartbreak and harm.

I beg you to listen to someone who knows

I've stood where you're standing, I know how this goes,

But God, He had mercy, and opened my eyes,

To sin's empty promises, darkness and lies.

You're a treasure, my child, my gift from above,

And one day you'll realise how much you're loved.

Thank God, He delivers, redeems and restores

What the locust has eaten and then so much more

His mercy is deep and his grace knows no bounds

Though you're lost, it's my prayer, that one day you'll be found.

Forgetfulness

Forgetfulness  

Failure to Remember.

 

Philippians 3 v 13b-14

“but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”

 

It’s so easy for us to get caught up in the past. Sometimes it’s past achievements we rest on, where we’ve become proud of ourselves and allowed ourselves to get complacent.  Sometimes it’s past hurts we refuse to let go of which can make us bitter and stagnant.  Both will stunt our growth and keep us, motionless, where we are.   

 

God’s Word tells us to forget the things in our past that would hinder us.  Those things are different for each of us I am sure.  To forget something means “to fail to remember” it.  I wonder what things might be keeping us from reaching forward – stretching with outstretched hands – to the things God has prepared for our future.  What is holding us back from pressing towards that final, glorious goal and winning the prize?  What are we holding onto that makes us too emotionally drained to exert the continuous physical force we need to “press” toward that goal?  What open sores do we keep poking at, never allowing to heal? 

 

If it’s a broken heart from a failed relationship, then take comfort in the fact that the Lord is near to those who have a broken heart (Psalm 34v18). Take Him at His Word.  If it’s bereavement, He will comfort you in your mourning (Matthew 5v4). If it’s guilt that is crippling you and causing you to keep looking over your shoulder at your sin and the aftermath of it, then you need to remember Psalm 103v12 where He promises to remove our sins from us, as far as the east is from the west.  Where we have made poor choices in our family lives, and lacked integrity and fairness in the past, all we need to do is ask for wisdom for the future and He will grant it (James 1v5).

 

We need not be crippled by the things we are ashamed of in our pasts.  If we are truly repentant, we are forgiven.  There is now no condemnation for us.  Let’s live like we believe that.  

But let us also repent of our good deeds, which are filthy rags in His sight.  Let us consider everything rubbish compared to knowing Jesus as Lord.  Our righteousness does not come from any good works that we do, which we give ourselves a pat on the back for.  It comes from God, on the basis of faith.  He loves us not because of who we are and what we’ve done, but purely because of who HE is and what HE has accomplished on our behalf. 

With this in mind, let’s drop all the baggage and vanity we are holding onto, and strain forward towards far better things.  Let us learn to forget. 

Patience is a virtue

"Whoever is patient has great understanding,
but one who is quick-tempered displays folly."  Proverbs 14v29. 

There is such a lot packed into that one, short verse.  How often do we become easily irritated, short-tempered, impatient, ungracious in our dealings with people?  You don't have to answer that!  I can't even make the journey to work without becoming the person described in Proverbs 14v29.  By the time I arrive at my desk I've already huffed and puffed about various insignificancies and trivia, making unkind assumptions about people I don't even know.

This tells me I lack good sense, display poor judgment and am basically foolish.  All because I am a little impatient?!  In God's eyes, any impatience is sin, regardless of how negligible we think it is.  As Christians, our goal is to become more like Jesus, to draw others to Him by our lives and by our light.  

When we lose our cool with our children, our parents, our husbands or wives and anyone else who may cross our daily paths, we are not living according to His will.  It's inexcusable. But thankfully it's forgivable if we take it to the Lord and confess it and ask for his help to start afresh, and seek the forgiveness of those we have wronged.

This is a daily battle.  It's not a one-time decision we make that says "Today I'll be patient" and then we don't live it out.  Would we like others to deal with us the way we speak to them?  The answer will be a resounding NO if you are honest.

When we are not patient we miss out on so much.  When your child wants to tell you about his day.  When your teenager wants to ask you about a troubling friendship.  When your spouse wants to offload about a difficult colleague.  All these things make demands on our time and often come when we are trying to do 101 other things and we therefore become short and snappy.  Surely the people in our lives that we (say we) love, are more important than whether the mirrors get cleaned or the kitchen floor gets washed?  And when we don't allow the other person to finish speaking, and we interrupt with our tuppence-worth and opinion on the matter, doesn't that make us look stupid when we have jumped to the wrong conclusion?  If only we'd let them finish, we'd have understood what they were saying, been able to respond intelligently, and thus avoided looking like an idiot. 

There is no room for hot-headedness and pride in the Christian walk.  If we exercise patience in every aspect of our day, rather than retaliation and knee-jerk reaction, we will find that we handle things sensibly, with good judgement and are deemed wise by those around us.  

Today I have had to submit my will to His so many times already and the morning is barely over.  If I did things my way, it would be ugly and undignified.  Reacting as I know He'd want me to, makes a big difference.  Don't get me wrong, it's a struggle in my flesh because I am naturally impatient, but God is showing me that only by committing my every action and interaction to Him, can I learn to be who He has redeemed me to be.

Exceedingly Abundantly

 

 

"Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, ²¹ to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen."  (Ephesians 3v20-21)

 

 

 

 



 

 

 

Lately it seems like I've been hanging on by a thread.  That thread was connected to reality on one side and a gaping abyss on the other. I was dangling somewhere between the two and trying not to look down. 

 

God has been good to us.  His timing is never wrong and that is a lesson he has taught us very recently.  Sometimes in order to show His glory, He takes you to a place that only He can lift you out of.  When you're down there in the tangled mess of your own thoughts and fears, it can seem that there is no way out.  And sometimes there isn't.  Sometimes there is nothing else you can do in your own strength, and that's a frightening place to be, when it seems that things are spiralling out of your control.

 

The good news is that we serve a God who is able to do more than we could ever conjure up in our own imaginations.  He knows our needs.  He promises to take care of them.  Not the "need" for a new pair of Jimmy Choos, nor the "need" for a trip to a 5-star spa, but the real needs in our daily lives.  In the same way He provided manna for the Israelites in the wilderness, He has met all our needs over the past few difficult months due to unemployment.  And then, just at the right time, when we literally did not know how we'd manage another month of things remaining as they were, He has intervened and blessed us above and beyond what we deserve.  His provision and His timing were perfect. 

 

This period has taught us to lean more fully on Him and to trust Him, not leaning on our own understanding or efforts. 

 

Psalm 50v15 says "And call upon me in the day of trouble: I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me.”     That's exactly what He has done.  And He deserves all the glory and praise. 

 

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning." - James 1v17

 

And as I type these last lines, my play-list has started playing "Great is Thy Faithfulness".  It never ceases to amaze me how God takes care of us.  Who am I that he is mindful of me?  I am eternally grateful for all He has done for us.

 

Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift!!  2nd Corinthians 9V15

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



 

Sister Act

Proverbs 13:20 Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.

At a time when Christian women are being bombarded with false and insipid teaching, it's incredibly important for us to find like-minded female Christian friends to uphold, support and encourage us.  

If we're not careful of the company we keep, Proverbs tells us we'll suffer harm. 

This is relevant to me today because I have the privilege of meeting a good Christian friend for coffee after work.  It's a win-win situation: coffee AND great company!  Since I am a caffeine addict and have been known to like a good "blether", I'm looking forward to it.

This lady epitomises the Proverbs 31 woman and I am in awe of her.  Having lost my own mum in my 30s, and having my only sister living across the Atlantic, this friendship means a great deal to me since I can count on one hand the amount of people I consider Godly women in my life.

It's a joy to have a friend I can share Christian literature with.  To share hospitality with.  To study the bible with. To pray with, and know she upholds me and my family in prayer as well.  To open my heart to, knowing I won't be judged, but perhaps gently corrected if need be.  These are the friendships we need, ladies.  These are the friendships that we need to get excited over.  I have discovered some Sisters in Christ recently who I know without a shadow of a doubt, I'll meet one day when we get to heaven.  That makes me smile, because I won't meet them on this earth given our geographic locations and distance from one another.  But I am so thankful for their influence and encouragement even from afar. 

But I also have to stop and ask myself, "What kind of friend am I?"  It's great to have Godly women pouring in to my life, but am I learning from that and being the friend God would want me to be?  It's not all about what I can get, but should be about what I can give, too. 

To have Sisters in Christ is a wonderful blessing.  I'd like to encourage you to be a blessing in return.  There are so many ways we can minister, if we are open to the leading of the Holy Spirit in our lives, as confirmed by His Word.  There is so much we can model to other women who may be younger in their faith and need some guidance.  What example are we showing in our marriages?  Are we scripturally submissive, or do we scoff at that notion?  What messages are we sending out about being a Godly mother?  If we are wavering on these points, we need to seek out mature women to teach us, as described in Titus 2:3-5.  This depicts the picture of grounded Christian women teaching those who are less mature in their faith. 

Whether you fall into the category of the more mature Christian Sister, or the younger, not-long-started-on-the-narrow-path Christian Sister, it is vital that we learn from one another, uphold one another, stick together and thank God for that common ground that is only made possible by the power of His resurrection and his acceptance of us into His family once we have been made right with Him. 

"I'm so glad I'm a part of the family of God
I've been washed at the fountain, cleansed by his blood
Joint heirs with Jesus as we travel this sod,
For I'm so glad I'm a part of the family of God".

Defiance and Defeat

I've been reading in Joshua the story of how the Israelites were defeated at Ai, immediately after their resounding victory at Jericho.  They couldn't believe that after such success, came crushing defeat. 

The Lord had led them to defeat Jericho but told them not to take any of the spoils for themselves, because certain items were to be devoted to the Lord.  They were explicitly told, in Joshua 6:18-19 "by all means abstain from the accursed things, lest you become accursed when you take of the accursed things and make the camp of Israel a curse, and trouble it.  But all the silver and gold, and vessels of bronze and iron, are consecrated to the Lord; they shall come into the treasury of the Lord."
The Lord's command was very clear and unambiguous. 

Achan decided to disobey, and take from Jericho, some of the items which were to be consecrated to the Lord, and his defiance not only consequently brought defeat at Ai, but cost him and his family their lives, just as God had clearly told them would happen if they disobeyed. 

God finds Joshua flat on his face wailing and moping after their defeat at Ai, and basically tells him he can't expect to be victorious against his enemy, whilst disobedience and defiance run rampant in the camp.   God's presence was no longer with them.  However he gives them a chance to put it right and come into communion with him again once the sin was purged from among them.

It made me wonder about the sins we harbour in our own lives, or try to hide, as Achan did, hoping no one will notice.  The things that God can't bless us in.  The things that cause Him to turn His face from us because He is a Holy God.  Are we being defeated in areas of our lives and pretending we don't know why?  Are we on our faces crying out to the Lord, "Why me?" when we know we are breaking his commands and breaking His heart?  Do we think there are no consequences to our sin?  Of course there are.  Unless we get before God and confess, seeking his forgiveness, the consequence will be the same as Achan faced.  Spiritual and physical death. 

Each of us may have our own "accursed thing" that is keeping us from a closer walk with God.  Have we gone our own way even though He's blessed us and given us victory in certain areas of our lives? Have we become cocky in our own strength?   Do we think we know better and can flout his commands and expect Him to turn a blind eye?  When God gives us his Word, and we deliberately disobey it, we have no excuse.  We cannot say "but I didn't know ..." because he makes his expectations very clear.  Whether we like them or not is a different matter.  We are to be consecrated and set apart, a holy people, not conformed to this world but transformed by the renewing of our minds.  What things have a hold on us that we need to release?  What are the things we are holding onto out of selfish ambition?  What things do we need to fall on our face before God about, sincerely seeking his forgiveness and help? 

I am not a believer in the prosperity gospel.  God does not bless us with financial gain, perfect health, a bigger house, a fancy car, the salvation of our children on demand, etc, just because we're saved or because we speak it into existence with positive words or because we've paid lip service to conquering a few more sins.  He promises us that in the final analysis, all things will work together for good (Romans 8:28) but we're not promised plain sailing in this world.  Quite the opposite in fact.  We're told we WILL have trouble in this world, but the good news is that Christ has overcome the world.  Addressing the hidden sin in our lives is not the green card to your happy ever after on this earth, but it is the key to a closer walk with your Saviour.  Let's throw off the things that have even a whiff of evil about them, so that we are unencumbered and able to follow the path laid out before us in order to claim the rewards we are promised in heaven. 

It's important for all of us to turn over to God, those things that we know the Holy Spirit is convicting us of.  Flirting with your co-workers is not innocent. Gossiping is not harmless.  Arrogance is not becoming.  Immodesty is provocative and Jezebel-like.  Impatience is not "just the way you are".  Sleeping with your partner just because you're getting married anyway, is not ok.  Seek His Word.  Pursue holiness. 

Obedience brings victory, but defiance brings defeat. 

Lord open our eyes to the accursed things in our own lives that we may gain favour in your eyes and be close to you once again.

Pie of the Humble kind

Proverbs 1:7b 

"Fools despise wisdom and instruction"

I've been a Christian since I was 7 years old.  I was brought up in a bible believing church, attended Sunday school, youth meetings, prayer meetings, weekend socials, church camp, and even taught Sunday school to pre-schoolers.

You'd think I'd have a great grasp of the Word of God, wouldn't you?  Well, I certainly thought so.  I did well in the Quizzes, the Sunday School exams, I read "the manual" of my church as a teenager, I kept a diary of my daily devotions and prayer times, I highlighted passages in my bible, stuffed it full of "holy" bookmarks and was thrilled when it started to  fall apart because that meant it had seen a great deal of use and I must be a pretty good Christian as a result.

I coasted along nicely until I met someone who started to say things that challenged my core beliefs.  The things that the bible definitely told me.  I read it.  It was in there.  I don't know where, but it was in there.  How dare they say such things when I knew better.  How dare they be so sure THEY were right when it was obvious I was right and they were wrong?  And anyway, they'd only been saved 5 minutes. 

"Did you know it wasn't actually an apple in the garden of Eden that Eve took?  The bible doesn't say it was an apple".

"Do you know the sinner's prayer is not biblical at all?  You won't find anyone mentioning it in the bible".

"Do you know that repentance means to "change your mind"?

What?  Of course it was an apple!  It's right there in Genesis!  We were taught all about the forbidden fruit and it was an apple!  And what do you mean the sinner's prayer isn't in the bible? How else are we supposed to ask Jesus into our heart? What do you mean that's another phrase that's man made?  And I'm good with words. I KNOW Repentance means to say you're sorry.  So there.  Go back and rethink your position. 

Such simple things I'd picked up and believed without questioning; things I'd taken for granted for most of my adult life.  What an eye opener to actually realise I had been wrong all this time.  Pass me a shovel for this humble pie I have to eat. 

No one likes to be proved wrong, especially in an area they see themselves as an expert.  And especially NOT by someone who is a newbie to the whole Christianity thing and has barely started his walk with God. 

It sparked more of a hunger for the Word of God.  The true, unadulterated, actual, unambiguous Word, to understand more.  Where else had I been wrong?  I needed to put it right and not carry on down the path of blind assumption.

God has been gracious in opening my eyes to things I hadn't noticed before.  Small things perhaps, but things that are exciting to learn about.  Bigger things too.  Things that matter. 

So after I got over being humiliated by that man, and having to rethink some pretty basic things, I did the only thing I could do.  I married him!

Sometimes we are quick to shut someone down because of our own arrogance and pride.  Especially if that person has a colourful past.  Maybe we look at their lives and see the sin they have been delivered from, and lord it over them.  Maybe we don't want to take advice from someone like that.  We operate on a "what do they know?" mentality. 

What right do we have?  Can't God use broken and dirty vessels once he's taken them, fixed them, and given them a purpose?  Of course He can.  He makes all things beautiful in His time.  Some of us take longer than others.  I'm just grateful for a Godly husband to make this journey with me.  We may be imperfect but we are His and He's at work in us.